Had a lovely drive..

Firstly thank you to those that have posted comments on my last post, I appreciate them very much but I hope no-one thought I was just hoping to get sympathy with that post, cos thats certainly wasnt my intention. You know I really feel that my blog is a very good release for me, and it also helps other people see a big insight into how my crazy mind works sometimes. Though gods forbid what would happen if any of my family ever read it, I think they would section me very quickly..lol

Anyway after posting that post, the weather picked up considerably and so did my mood, so I decided to take myself off for a drive into the countryside. So that's exactly what I did. I made up a flask of tea and found some nibbles and just got in the car and, after picking up my medication from the Dr's in the little village up the road, I took one of the side roads on the way home and went through the lovely country lanes near me. I saw some gorgeous lambs, and lots and lots of that horrible rapeseed plants in the fields. Actually they looked like fields of gold - you know that Eva Cassidy song "Fields of Gold" that is exactly what the fields near me looked like. Absolutely gorgeous. I pulled into a layby, watched a farmer on his tractor going about his daily work, and while listening to Radio 2 sat and drank my cup of tea and nibbles, with the windows wide open. It was a truly glorious time and it was definately something that I think I needed.

I forgot how close to the countryside we are here, its literally just 5 mins drive away, plus we also have the beach a 10 min drive away if I really want to be daring..lol. Although I do prefer the countryside with all the wildlife running around nearby. Its a shame I didnt take my camera, but I will remember it next time I take a drive.

I was also a twit, I sent a letter to J via his sister. But I will admit I feel tons better by doing this, I think I have had some sort of epiphany with this. Its still hard, but it is so much easier now.

I think thats why I am feeling like I am at the moment, I am trying to put my life into some major perspective and actually take those babysteps to move onwards, and every so often I dont want to leave the safety zone that I have known for so long, so I dig my heels in.

My mood: