ack who moved The Wagon

I have just tried to log into a couple of BB's and they come up with a load of gobbly gook..:-( EEEks answer me this how am I going to cope through the day without going to check out these boards.? Eeeks panic mode..lol.

No seriously for some reason ezboard in its extreme knowledge has decided to shut down The Wagon and SS board. Hmmm!!!

Oh well off to sort some stuff out, then will hopefully blog about the last few days as I have neglected the blog and my poor readers.

Lost a lover

Just something I found while surfing, and I quite liked it..

Lost a lover
Gained a friend
I can't afford all the love that I spend
You said you'd wait for me
But there's not commitment I see

Can't you see I'm in love with you
Can't you see there's so much I do
You keep my head spinning around
It's hard to keep my feet on the ground

Talk to you in metaphor
I know the end babe
I've been there before
Oh how I want to be your friend
But I don't want this love to end

Thought our love would go on and on
Now I can't believe your gone
Like the heavens have no end
Why can't I have your love again

She Sits & Cries

The days go bye
She sits and she cries
She dosent know why
But shes sick of the lies

Everyone telling her its gonna be ok
But she does know the truth
She dosent belive what they say
She knows nothing is gonna be fine

While everyones smiling
She sits there crying
Because nobody knows how she really feels
The life she lives isnt real

So she thinks to herself
Who would miss her if she were to go
And then she realized she really didnt have anybody
This is the quiet things nobody will know

Ooops crack in window

Well the workmen arrived nice and early to install the new door and porch windows..it was looking really nice too. But I just heard this almighty crack and one of the workmen holding his head in his hands. On inspection I have a bloody great crack down the new porch window..eeeks. So I think they are now ringing to get a new one pretty damn quick, as I am not going to give them the cheque upon completion now.. :-(

Its one of those things so cant be helped, thankfully they arent that far away so should be able to bring a replacement quick. Although it has to be cut to size and the bevel done too.. Hope its done before Dave gets home tonight otherwise he wont be very impressed..eeks.

Nearly midnight..

And I havent updated for a couple of days, but as I am heading off to bed now will do it in the morning :) Have a wee bit to blog about so will make sure I do it tomorrow.

Finally accepted it..

After yet another morning of non stop crying because as I was making my way upstairs with a cup of tea and a bowl of shreddies and I cant even remember how it happened, but all I know is I was flat on my face and the hot cup of tea had spilt all over the wallpaper and the shreddies on the floor. I just collapsed in a heap and howled the place down. I rang Dave terrified he would have a go at me because the hallway had only just been decorated. I was blubbing down the phone at him saying how sorry I was etc.. Poor lamb all he kept saying was its not serious and he can paint over it at the weekend. But I wasnt happy, to me it was the end of the world. I dont even know why I was thinking like that..

Anyway took myself back to bed and I am still here at 3.10pm, and I have been crying all morning and I am feeling so low. But it just dawned on me.. I am having a major down cycle. I have been cycling for a while now, and I cant even put my finger on when it started.. I have been up and down like a yoyo for a while

For all those that dont know what I am talking about here are two very good articles on what I suffer from:

Cyclothymia or Bipolar III
BiPolar III
BiPolar III

And if anyone tells me to pull myself together I am personally going to send them a bomb through the post.. because thats what a few "friends" used to say to me before they realised what it was. Although even after finding the diagnosis a couple still say it when I am down, which is why I take myself away from people and do not talk to anyone for ages till I am back out of the downwards cycle. Athough at the moment the downs and ups are very close together.

Well so much for that idea..

After I had promised my oh so ever so nice CPN *I dont actually like him..grrr* that I would get dressed before I actually come downstairs, that kind of failed today.

I did get up at a reasonable time, 9.30am as the postie knocked at the door to get me to sign for the Alphabet RR that I am in and we had a chat while she was there. So I thought I would make a cup of tea while I was down here, then had to ring Dave to tell him my DLA has been cut by £80.00 a month :-( But at least I am still getting it till 2007, so mustnt complain.

Then I decided to have a chat to Barbara on the phone to tell her about my mishap with the Alphabet RR piece I have. I had stitched it all up ready to send only to discover I have stitched it the wrong way..so have to unpick it all and redo it the right way..aaaaaaaah!!

Well it is now 11.19am and I am still in pj's and gasping for another cup of tea, so will make one and then go and have my shower as I want to pop into town and pick up some padded envelopes for various postings that I have to do. I cant believe I dont have any in the house..hmmm!!! Then I have to package up the SS stuff to send, some bits to send to Brilliant in America and also to pop some things in the post for Belinda in America as I keep meaning to do it but I keep forgetting and I have had a few bits here for her for ages now..oops. Also I have to parcel up Donna's cd software that I said she could have last week, and I haven't got round to it yet..oh dear where is my head these days!!!

Just a thought before I retire for the night..

Just Naturally
	Friends are like flowers That's how it should be So sweet and so special Just naturally Writing this poem So you know that I care Sending a flower With love always there Soft and so smooth With fragrance divine With greatest emotion My love is defined Hope when you get this You'll send it to me Keep love just flowing That's how it should be. ~ Francine Pucillo ~© original 2001

I've been tagged..

Thank you Tammy
Pick five things from the following list, and then complete the sentence, and then go on and tag another 3 people.

The List

If I could be a scientist . . .
If I could be a farmer . . .
If I could be a musician . . .
If I could be a doctor . . .
If I could be a painter . . .
If I could be a gardener . . .
If I could be a missionary . . .
If I could be a chef . . .
If I could be an architect . . .
If I could be a linguist . . .
If I could be a psychologist . . .
If I could be a librarian . . .
If I could be an athlete . . .
If I could be a lawyer . . .
If I could be an inn-keeper . . .
If I could be a professor . . .
If I could be a writer . . .
If I could be a llama-rider . . .
If I could be a bonnie pirate . . .
If I could be an astronaut . . .
If I could be a world famous blogger . . .
If I could be a justice on any one court in the world . . .
If I could be married to any current famous political figure . .

Okay here goes:

If I could be a chef.. I would make the most delicious dessert that everyone would be scrambling over themselves to market in their restaurant.

If I could be a farmer.. I would have a self sufficient farm with plenty of vegetables, cattle, sheep, chickens, ducks and horses. I would grow my own wheat and make my own bread from this wheat. I would never have to go to a supermarket ever again as I could just go into the garden and pick the veg needed for dinner.

If I could be a bonnie pirate.. I would set sail and explore all the unknown regions of the oceans, acquiring pretty aquisitions on my way. I would also stitch the Jolly Roger flag and have it proudly on display. I would be like the Robin Hood of pirates, robbing the rich seagoers to pay the travels of the poor.

If I could be an architect.. I would design the prettiest craft shop, with a thatched roof, little alcoves with beautiful georgian windows. And inside there would be enough shelving to stock every cross stitch chart and pattern that was available in the world. There would be squishy couches in the alcoves with just the right amount of lighting, so that people could sit and stitch if they wished.

If I could be a scientist.. I would make it my personal goal to discover a cure for all the forms of cancer that are out in the world.

Now who shall I tag...mmm let me think? First of all Angelsan, then I shall go for Bluemoon and finally Broomhilda I am hoping they will find it as fun filling this is as I did :)

If I could catch a rainbow

If I could catch a rainbow
I would do it just for you
And share with you its beauty
On the days you're feeling blue
~*~
If I could build a mountain
You could call your very own
A place to find serenity
A place to be alone
~*~
If I could take your troubles
I would toss them in the sea
But all these things
I'm finding are impossible for me
~*~
I cannot build a mountain
Or catch a rainbow fair
But let me be what I know best
A friend that's always there

(author unknown)

Aaaaah mice - Manic mania

Spoke to a couple of neighbours today and it seems that this side of my road has a wee problem. Because of the due lack and consideration by our lovely council, the waste land that was garages, over the back of us seems to have turned into a breeding pit and we are now seeing the consequences..grrr. My neighbours told me to check all around the cupboards by the doors and where they had taken out the old boiler as apparently everyone has had a visitor or two..eeeww!!

Anyway when Dave came home from work before I had even told him this, Bear started crying by the back door and pawing at the Oxyclean tin..upon inspection underneath there was a squashed mouse..eww again!!! So I then went into manic moad and completely emptied the cupboards top and bottom and threw two black sackfuls away of everything that was in there whether we needed it or not. Only trouble is I now have to buy some new dusters..grr. I then totally covered everything in white vinegar and scrubbed till my hands were raw with the scrubbing of surfaces.

When we put everything back, boy were those cupboards empty..still they are nice and tidy :-)

So after a ruined evening I sat down to watch Hustle, only to have that rudely interupted by Bear again. He was crying and trying to get under the living room dresser. Well on closer inspection it turns out we have a field mouse, not a house mouse this time, taking residence under our dresser..ack!! So after a lot of banging about, shining a torch near it the poor mouse fled in horror outside its bolt hole and into the alley outside the house. I then pulled everything out, including the dresser, into the middle of the room and totally hoovered the lounge thoroughly and then sprinkled white vinegar around the edges of the carpet etc. We also sealed up the cable hole in the wall where the offending creature got through.

I am now sitting here with a gleaming kitchen and a gleaming living room, smelling like I am in a chip shop but none the less totally bacteria and rodent free. I am now itching like mad and feel unclean..ewww

And my whole evening has been a total disaster.. :-(

Well I'ts sad I have joined the big girl panties brigade :-(

While I was out shopping getting some nice summer bits I need some new undies. So I treated myself to a couple of matching bra and knicker sets, then looked at the packs of panties. And after looking at what they had on offer I went for the black and lace all over panties. Now this is sad I am 37 and I am finally wearing Bridge Jones style knickers..ack!! but and here's the sad thing - they are really so comfortable I even felt like I didnt have any on. Gods that is bad.!! But on the good point I have a couple of lovely lacey designs bras with nice patterns on :)

And I have also decided my DH has lost the plot. I caught him giving the last rites to the sieve tonight before throwing it away. Ok I know I bought a new colander in chrome, but there was no need to sing the last past and give it a funeral was there..lol. Sad man!

This is definately sent to test me...

Yesterday we had the engineer out to fix our telephone that had been out of action since Monday morning and we thought it was working fine. NOPE, how wrong I was. The engineer went away and the phone was working when he left, fine I thought.. Then this morning I am getting phone calls on my mobile phone .. hmm I start to think why are they ringing my mobile and not the home phone? So I check the phone and voila - it doesnt work AGAIN

So on the phone to Telewest, thankfully I had enough credit on the mobile but I shall definately have to get more credit at this rate, am down to my last 2p Well it looks like its a bit more severe than we first thought, so a lovely technician is coming out this afternoon between 12 and 4 to hopefully to sort it once and for all. Now I say hopefully in the loose term because I am not holding my breath..lol.

If the phone is not working tomorrow boy I would not like to be Telewest as I am going to let rip then..so they better get the job right this afternoon.

On a lighter note Dave has signed and sealed the porch being done, and the surveyor is coming out this afternoon at 4pm to measure up etc.. and they are coming to do it all on 24th of this month. Oooh I cant wait a lovely new porch, door and new window in the porch..woohooo. Still its costing enough £1,450 but that is £1,000 less than other companies.

Now I just have to persuade Dave that we definately need the patio doors done before the summer..we had a quote last night and he was happy with that but its now getting him to agree.

Still mustn't complain he is getting the porch done, and letting me have a fair bit of money to go shopping at the weekend, and getting the new laptop for me :)

Someone give me a kick..

I am still in my pj's, watching Sue Thomas on t.v. and getting freezing cold feet, cos I cant be bothered to get up and shut the patio doors..lol.

I had all these plans for today, like go to the libary - wow isnt that exciting!! Have to ring around the couple of double glazing places that were shut on Saturday- double exciting!! Also have to tidy the living room up as we are having a man come round to quote for our porch window and front door --- oooh woopee doo a strange man coming to the house..lol. As if I dont have enough odd people coming to the house..lol.

Oh well think I will get another cup of tea and go and get this darn shower and turf the dog off the bed so I can make it..:-)

Had a shock today

Dave took me touring around double glazing places today for a quote on rebuilding our porch and putting a new front door and window in there. Well the first two places were shut so that was pointless. Went to the last one and it was actually very nice. They had two dogs lounging around in reception and a parrot in a cage there. We also got to look round the factory - wow exciting NOT!! Anyway Dave booked them to come and give us a quote Monday evening at 7.pm. So byebye to nearly £2,000 I would imagine.

Anyway we went onto Hempstead Valley Shopping Centre for a nose around and to have some lunch. Not that its changed that much, still the same shops in it. In fact none of them have actually disappeared since we used to go there about 8 years ago for our shopping each week. Had a mooch around, a quick coffee in Morrelli's, popped into WHSmiths, had a nose at mobile phones to price them up in Virgin then onto the food court for lunch.

Well it was there I got my shock - who was on a table about two tables down from us was Mick. Wow shock of all shocks, he was the last person I expected to see. Still it was nice to see his wife hasnt changed, she still looks like a witch..lol. He had his twins with him and I was amazed at how much they had grown, although they are now 9yrs old. His little girl is the spitting image of his eldest daughter Louise, when she was that age its uncanny. Well he saw me and the look on his face..it was a picture. Talk about trying to keep his wife's attention, I think he was terrified she would turn around and see me. That would have been interesting a cat fight in the middle of Hempstead..lol. Thankfully Dave had his back to them so he didnt see them otherwise that could have been nasty.

It was funny really as it didnt really shake me that much, I was more surprised to see him in there..lol. Shall see if I get a phone call on Monday morning with the third degree..lol.

Anyway its now nearly 1am and I need to go to sleep..

I was going to post

about how my cpn meeting with my new one, and Most Haunted Live tonight, but I am shattered so I am leaving it till tomorrow. Besides I am too tired to do anything else..lol.

Night.xxx

Hopefully my new toy

Laptop - each £ 999.99













Intel® CentrinoTM Mobile Technology Intel® Pentium® M Processor 740 Processor speed 1.73GHz

* 533MHz FrontSideBus
* 2MB L2 cache
* 90nm
* Intel® PRO/Wireless LAN 2915ABG
* Intel® Chipset 915PM

nVIDIA® GeForceTM Go 6600 with 128MB DDR3 PCI-Express

nVIDIA® GeForceTM Go 6600 is the superior notebook GPU with hardware acceleration for Microsoft DirectX 9.0. Shader Model 3.0, powering higher performance and extraordinary visual effects on today's hottest games.

15.4" WXGA Display 16:10 Widescreen

Resolution up to 1280 x 800 pixels

Multi Format DVD Burner 8xDVD±R/RW Double Layer^

For watching and burning DVDs/CDs. Write speed: 8xDVD+R/8xDVD-R/ 4xDVD+RW/4xDVD-RW/5xDVD-RAM/2, 4xDVD+R DL/24xCD-R/10xCD-RW, Read speed: 8xDVD/24xCD.

1024 MB DDR 2 RAM 533MHz

Fastest laptop memory currently available on the market. Up to 30% faster than DDR 1-400, 2 sockets.

Fast 100GB Hard Disk Drive

With 5,400rpm. Made by Seagate.

Digital TV Tuner***

Discover the new digital television of the future with first class image and sound quality. Future proof.

Analogue Stereo TV

Analogue stereo TV & FM Radio Tuner Card. Watch and record TV on your laptop! With Power Cinema and the built-in analogue/digital stereo TV and FM tuner, you can watch and record TV programs right on your laptop! The included IR remote control works with the TV, DVD, CD, radio and digital photo functions of the Power Cinema software.

Intel®PRO/Wireless LAN 2915ABG

The notebook can be linked to a wireless LAN network or in an ad hoc mode, with another wireless LAN compatible notebook. Integrated wireless LAN enables this notebook to be linked to a wireless network i.e. hotspots.

5 in 1 Card Reader

Supports Memory Stick, Smart Media Card, MultiMedia Card, Secure Digital and XD Card.

Soundsystem

High definition audio system, SB-Pro-compatible +AC 97 CODEC, 2 internal speakers, internal microphone.

Bluetooth Mini USB Adaptor Class 1

Up to 100m indoor and outdoor.

High Speed Interfaces

4 x USB 2.0, 1 x Firewire IEEE1394.

Audio & Video Interfaces

Analog and digital audio-out, Mic-In, VGA-Out, TV-Out (S-Video).

1x PCMCIA Type II Card Bus supported Modem and LAN

56k V.90/V.92 modem and fast ethernet 10/100/1000 Mbit LAN (includes telephone cable).

Battery: Smart LI-ION Battery

8 cells, 4400mAh, Runtime: up to 4h. Charging time: approx. 2.5hr (power off)/ approx 3.5hr (power on).

Dimensions & Weight: 363(W) x 366(D) x 34.2(H)mm, approx 2.75kg.

Huge Software Package!**

Microsoft® Windows®XP Home SP2, Microsoft® Works Suite 2005, Microsoft® Flight Simulator 2004, Cyberlink DVD Solution (PowerStarter, PowerDVD, PowerProducer, PowerDirector, Power2Go, PowerDVD Copy, PowerBackup, PhotoNow!, MediaShow), Cyberlink Power Cinema 4.0, Skype Software incl. Headset and 120 minutes free telephony, Wanadoo Preload

^You are only permitted to copy material if you own the copyright of that material or if you have permission to do so from the copyright owner. If you are not the owner of the copyright you are possibly violating laws and you might be subject to prosecution **OEM Version. Gericom Customer helpline: 0871 71 11 881. *** Digital television channel availability is subject to coverage and your local DVB-T signal strengh. Digital television channels are subject to change, from time to time, without notice. The number of channels available or your reception quality may depend on the condition of your existing terrestrial television aerial. An aerial upgrade may be required. Digital radio or DAB radio channels cannot be received with the included DVB-T card and software. Not all broadcast EPG or interactive functions may be available with the included software.


Talk about mega..this is superduper fast - 1gb ddr ram..wow is all I can say. And a 100gb hard drive..heaven :)

Mentioned it to Dave, and he said if I really wanted one then I would have to pay it off on the CC..but he will buy it initially. Just have to wait till May 12th..:)

Woohooo cant wait :)

Just been looking at Blogpatrol

And am totally lost..what on earth is a blocked referrer? And how do I let them see my blog? Cannot find a help button on blogpatrol or anything to check this out..hmmmm More digging around I think, seeing as its the same person eveyrtime that gets blocked.. :(

Havent posted for a couple of days - so here's a recap..

Had a good mayday weekend :)

Although first thing Saturday morning ws a bit sad as I had to take my lovely little car to the scrapyard. I followed Dave along the main road and really had trouble catching the car up..my little car just didnt want to know. She was making so many odd noises I am sure she knew where she was going. Anyway handed her over and now I am no longer her owner :( It felt so sad, yeah I know shouldnt get so attached to a car but me and her have been through so much during the three years I have had her. I wont forget her as I have one of the number plates, which I am seriously considering transferring over to the Daewoo as it has NAT at the end of it and I doubt if I will ever get another one like that. But I do have the Daewoo to drive now, which is way superior than my little Renault. The only thing I find is I have to watch the speedo a lot as it quickly goes over limit without you realising - damn injection!!!!

Went to the farm, after dropping my car off, to pick up some gorgeous free range eggs. I must admit I am hooked on fresh farm eggs - no more supermarket eggs for us now.

Dave dropped me off at the hairdressers in the village on the way home and I had a lovely session in there having my hair cut and rehighlighted. I came out of there, after two hours, feeling a new person and my hair had lovely highlights in. Will definately be going back, in fact I was so impressed I have made another appointment in June to have the highlights touched up. Then popped over the road into the craft shop, and made friends with Jan, the owner. We chatted away for about an hour and half. She is a lovely lady, and I do hope the shop does well. I will definately be going in there on a regular basis :-)

Once I got home I then dragged poor Dave off to Argos, as I had decided I was going to buy the Dyson Animal hoover that I wanted. So we got it, and boy do I love it. Its the new design with the ball underneath which makes it a lot easier:
This is a what my hoover is :)

Didnt do any stitching Saturday evening as I was shattered, so we sat and watched mindless t.v. all night...lol

Sunday I went mad and completely upstairs. I certainly put the new hoover through its paces, and I was amazed at the results. :-) I spent 4 hours gutting the bedrooms, bathroom and toilet and landing and stairs. And I mean gutting!!! There is not a speck of dust anywhere :-)

Dave cooked dinner as I fell asleep for about 3 hours in the afternoon.

Picked out what I am stitching for my AION Seasonal Cushion Exchange piece, but I cant show a picture till I have sent my piece to my recipient :-)

Monday was another busy day. I spent the morning ironing, yet still my ironing pile doesnt seem to be getting any lower. But the good news is that my washing basket is looking empty as the weather has been glorious all weekend to get all the washing done. Sorted out downstairs and played with the new hoover again - what a surprise !!!

Did a bit of stitching on an RR, but didnt achieve a lot. :-(

Actually had an early night, was in bed for 11pm which is a miracle for me :-)

Ack I am watching a programme called City Hospital, and poor Nick Knowles is talking to a doctor who is holding a prosthetic scrotum and telling him how to check for lumps etc..but he is literally manhandling them and poor Nick is wincing at what he is doing to these fake ones.. Basically they are saying to check for cancer/lumps etc on a regular basis. Now they have switched over to Nadia Swalhila and she is now saying that she thinks her bedtime activities are going to increase as she is going to check her hubby for lumps etc.. Poor Nick has gone beetroot..lol. :-)